Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Career Goal Report: a pentametric poem in six parts

This, this is just sad. This is the page image for the Occupational Outlook Handbook's article on "How to Become A Writer or Author".  The caption? "Freelance writers may have to manage multiple assignments simultaneously." Gee, is that all?
 As a junior in high school, I get a lot of pressure about what I plan to do with my future. Usually, when the subject of college is brought up, I just pretend to have spontaneously transformed into a cat. However, a "Career Goal Report" was required for Physics class, so I grudgingly did some research about my chosen occupation, the marvelous and wonderful world of creative writing... and turned in this as my report.

Career Goal Report:
a pentametric poem in six parts

1. Name of Career Goal:
The writers and the authors of this land
are those whose ranks I wish to join someday.
The poet with a pen oft in her hand
is whom I'm destined to become, I say.
I do not want to be a journalist,
reporting facts like modern heraldry—
I'm thinking more “literary artist,”
The NAVIANCE test result AIE.

2. Motivation/Inspiration:
My motivation to pursue this goal
is rooted in a pure, unbounded love
of words and tales and writing as a whole—
I fit into the role as hand to glove.
In fact, the reason I learned how to read
was so that I could write my stories down,
and, at that young age, planted was the seed
that's brought me worlds of pleasure and renown.

3. Likelihood of Achieving Your Career Goal:
Alas, it is no easy path to tread,
for there are many hopefuls who would die
to write a book universally read—
and yet I will let nothing stop me try.
Despite statistics daunting, grim and bleak—
just six percent growth in the next ten years—
self-publishing will soon be at its peak,
a revolution for me and my peers!

4. Education/Training:
At least two years of college is thought wise,
along with writing institutes and such,
some peer workshops to teach you to revise,
and editing work would help very much.
Of course, if you're the genius of your age,
you may not need degrees to make great art,
but since most of us aren't on Shakespeare's page,
attending college would be the best start.

5. Education/Training Cost:
Assuming four-year college is the norm,
about twenty-one thousand is the price,
or, if the two-year college is your form,
that's seven thousand dollars' sacrifice.
Of course, there's some emotional cost, too,
that calculations tangible exclude,
but I believe my love will see me through—
my love of writing, stronger than if glued.

6. Earnings:
The average earnings for an author's year
is fifty thousand four-twenty hundred,
so poverty's not quite a thing to fear,
if, when saving, you keep a level head.

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