tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7662646473307404282.post1497482658894936425..comments2019-04-11T08:24:46.378-04:00Comments on Mapping Out a Sky: MagniloquenceAmata le Fayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02268831755921641846noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7662646473307404282.post-12480021613186084012013-02-06T17:25:43.045-05:002013-02-06T17:25:43.045-05:00Thanks for reading! I'm not entirely happy wit...Thanks for reading! I'm not entirely happy with this poem--something's a bit off about it that I can't quite place; maybe the "eeriness" you picked up on--but I'm glad you liked it! And I put "pretentious" on pretty much all of my posts, just in case someone takes them the wrong way...<br /><br />~AmataAmata le Fayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02268831755921641846noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7662646473307404282.post-20102276534118577882013-02-05T19:55:19.182-05:002013-02-05T19:55:19.182-05:00Well, this poem was... eerie. In a good way. As ...Well, this poem was... eerie. In a good way. As in, it was... not eerie, so that it was eerie. But it was eerie in the first place. But-- This isn't making any sense. Never mind.<br /><br />I liked the repetition; combined with the rhyme scheme, it made the poem flow really well... and be a bit eerier. Though I could still see the optimism. I can see where you and the whole teenage-experience come in to play here. Interesting.<br /><br />I didn't think it was /that/ pretentious... it almost sounded, instead... I don't know, pleading-ish? I would think of maybe your main character from "Fly Away" writing this.<br /><br />Well, nicely done!<br /><br />~Hannah<br /><br />Lavender Flamehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11498605255040743061noreply@blogger.com